Quest Atkinson offers sweet advice for entrepreneurship and mental health
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Photo Credit: MaryCarla Quintazzi Photo
Young Women in Business Toronto (YWiB) aims to provide our diverse community of young, self-identified women with genuine career advice, encouragement, and examples of local role models. That's why, for the next few months, we’ll be interviewing both career professionals and entrepreneurs our community can be inspired by and learn from.
Quest Atkinson, Founder of COCO XO Chocolate
Many people love chocolate, but maybe not as much to become a professional chocolatier! What made you want to study chocolate-making and get into this type of business?
First, I want to make a distinction; there’s actually a difference between a chocolate maker and chocolatier. A chocolate maker works ‘bean to bar’; they process the cacao bean to produce chocolate. A chocolatier, however, takes already processed, refined chocolate and makes products with it. Lindt is an example of a Chocolate-maker, but a chocolatier works with chocolate like theirs and creates their own products such as barks, lollies, truffles, etc.
To answer your question though, the simple truth is that I’ve always LOVED chocolate. It’s well known among my family and friends. A few years ago I saw chocolatiers pouring chocolate at a storefront in a mall. This obviously caught my eye (!) so I went in to inquire about a job - totally out of curiosity. I realized I needed to have a specific training or background to become a chocolatier. It hadn’t crossed my mind before as I didn’t realize it was there was a training specification for chocolate no less an entire career!
I searched for programs in Toronto right away and luckily found one offered at George Brown College. My original plan was to take the training to go back to work for the business I saw in the mall. In time, my husband nudged me to leave my office job and start my own business instead. We both knew I had an entrepreneurial spirit — even though I hadn’t pursued business ownership up until that point.
Ultimately a series of things collided for me: a serious love for chocolate, my curious nature, and a chance of taking up a local opportunity to do something I was interested in.
The running joke in my family is that I am a bit of a ‘chameleon.’ Never sticking to one thing; always trying new things.
My relationship with my dad also impacted my career choice. He has always supported my endeavors and new pursuits, ever since I was a young adult. He’s always ready to support me no matter what I’m up to. I’ve been running my chocolate business for two years now, so I guess this passion has stuck!
Thanks for clarifying that difference between those careers! Shifting gears now, Quest: You mention on your website that you've struggled with anxiety and depression. How do these experiences impact your approach to entrepreneurship, your products, and your brand?
This is an interesting and challenging question for me. When I was reflecting on entrepreneurship and my mental health challenges, I was not sure if there was an impact there. When it comes to my business and brand however, loving and encouraging others is threaded throughout everything I do. For example, I write handwritten notes (scratch cards) for my customers, even when I don’t know them. These come from my heart and what I think people need to hear in terms of fostering self-love. One customer showed me a picture of them all posted on her fridge so she can see it every day and feel loved.
It’s not often that a business goes beyond the transaction and standard customer appreciation. My philosophy is that I genuinely want people to feel so loved -- through my products, the customization, and my entire brand. I know what it’s like to have a crappy day or season, so I also end all my IG Live sessions by telling people they’re loved, and often speak openly about my struggles with mental health. “Because you deserve to feel loved”...no matter what... that’s the unofficial tagline for my company. What I do is more than chocolate. I am in the business of loving others, rather than selling chocolate.
How do you set personal/professional boundaries for yourself as an entrepreneur?
This question also challenged me. DO I even set these boundaries? It’s hard because what I do is so closely tied to my identity and purpose. With such a strong connection, it’s often hard to set formal boundaries.
That being said, I do think it’s crucial for entrepreneurs to set boundaries. I also consider myself a creative person, so my mind is always going and developing new ideas, even outside of work hours. It’s hard to set regular work hours and boundaries for entrepreneurs, and I think it’s more of a fluid thing than rigid.
It’s worth mentioning that your life is flexible as an entrepreneur. Entrepreneurs don’t need to be 9-5. That is kind of the point of why many of us get into it, right? Our routines can change based on our own needs. All that being said, here are some things I've recently tried:
Setting daily priorities through a colour-coded whiteboard system
Setting work hour boundaries to create balance and allow for time to eat and focus on marriage, relationships, rest, and otherwise balance with my personal life
I try to observe a 6am-6pm day — with flexibility, of course
Making time to exercise and take evening walks with my husband
This has been a bit of an issue especially during the pandemic, as I used to dance and it’s harder to do so now with being cooped up inside during COVID
Working on my anxiety about going outside
I struggle with crowds, commuting and sometimes when my anxiety is bad, with being seen and talking to people. Sometimes the simplest of things like thinking about going grocery shopping, induces stress. My hope is my evening walks will help me get better at being outside again, and alone in public and comfortable in spaces.
Achieving balance yet consistency
Routine is important to my health but in balance. Being too regimented hinders creativity and thinking space, but no routine has always been detrimental. For me, I crave consistency in all areas of life, but with some flexibility. It feels good to have a routine and break the ‘rules’ sometimes
Thank you for being so candid about your experiences, I really appreciate that and know our readers will too. Entrepreneurship can certainly have its ups and downs. What do you tell yourself when you feel like giving up?
One of the most challenging things about entrepreneurship, at least for me (but maybe for others too) is how lonely it can be. Especially for solopreneurs. I’m so grateful for the faith community I’m a part of that prays for me, supports me, and offers encouragement and hope.
Sometimes I need to just have a cry, sometimes I just need to walk away, get a good sleep, or have a hot shower, and come back to whatever has been bothering me. This helps my brain and body process. It’s also important to remove myself from outside negativity, and step away from negative people or situations.
When I feel like giving up, I find confiding in people I trust is helpful. My husband, for example, can bring an outside perspective and potentially a clearer way of thinking about something. Cognitive Behavioural Therapy (CBT) has also helped me learn how to evaluate scenarios and ask myself questions to challenge my negative thoughts and feelings.
More mental health advice from YWiB Role Models? Read this interview with Megan Te Boekhorst
All in all, I need to find ways to process the situation. It rarely works to force myself to push through - oftentimes the outcomes are disastrous which makes it more frustrating and deflating. This often makes me more upset and comes through in my work. Chocolate knows the mood you’re in. My advice for others is that you need to know when to take a pause… whatever that looks like for you. Create some separation so you can think clearly.
What other advice would you give other young women entrepreneurs who also struggle with anxiety and/or depression, or other mental health challenges?
Connect with others. Get a mentor. This is a good practice in general as an entrepreneur. As well, there are great communities like SheEO, BITS, and WE-Hub which are so encouraging. They provide opportunities for you to meet with women with similar entrepreneurship journeys.
Value your time and skill, and charge appropriately. Understand your value and the value of what you offer. Do research on competitors and create benchmarks, be firm on them no matter how confident you are in yourself at the time.
Access therapy. If you don’t have benefits or can’t afford it, do some research as there are therapists out there who offer sliding scale rates. Be aware that not all therapy types work for all people so you’ll need to explore. If you can’t afford it, especially as a new entrepreneur, there are also OHIP-covered therapy options. I won’t pretend that the waitlists aren’t long, but you should get on them at least. If you find your free option doesn’t work for you, you don’t need to stick with it. Even though it's free doesn’t mean you can’t be referred to another option... so don’t be discouraged. For those also in the hospitality industry, there is a great organization called Not 9 to 5 that I encourage you to look into.
Practice gratitude. Evenings are restorative for me as the night somehow offers new hope for tomorrow. If you start the day off with some form of gratitude journaling, prayer, or meditation, it helps frame your day for a win. You’ll find the more you practice gratitude the more new things will emerge to be grateful for, which is both exciting and eye-opening!
Invest in the area you’re struggling with. For me, I find someone else dealing with a similar issue or challenge and invest energy into encouraging them. Within that process of refocusing my attention there is joy and positivity. It’s Important to invest back into the community and focus attention on others who are struggling. Depression can draw you inward, but sometimes refocusing our energy can help us too, and it’s a wonderful distraction.
Be intentional about finding your value. Have others who love you challenge your negative thoughts with purposeful and meaningful things about yourself.
Be careful about who you allow to speak into your life. Everyone has an opinion about everything and it’s not always aligned with our purpose or goals. Trust that ‘gut tickle’... trust yourself to know who is the right person to accept advice from.
Align yourself with a higher purpose. Whether this looks like faith, or a way of living, whatever that means for you. When you struggle with depression, life can start to feel meaningless quickly. Getting back to your purpose grounds you, anchors you. You will feel more fulfilled and rooted in your why.
Know your triggers. Some things can pull you down into depression or flair up your anxiety. For me, one is sleep; bad quality or lack of, especially consistently. Invest in getting good quality sleep. Sleep deprivation or fatigue can sometimes trick you into thinking you're falling into depression or anxiety. If you’re aware of your triggers, you can rationalize yourself through considerations of your feelings.
Be careful with toxic relationships. You should consider how they may be impacting your mental space and even your business success. Talk to people you trust if you’re experiencing this. Perhaps even a mental health professional if you think it’s necessary. I’ve been especially thinking about this during the COVID lockdown as research shows many women are suffering in abusive relationships during the pandemic.
Be flexible. Know and set your personal balance of routine vs. the flexibility you need to feel healthy and well. Set priorities with personal relationships and professional relationships.
Get comfortable with the uncertainties of entrepreneurship. Especially those of us with mental health challenges - we can’t allow fear to be our currency. If you live a life of fear you will restrict yourself and limit your curiosities. Fear tears down your mental and physical health and distracts you from moving forward. Choose to make faith/hope/personal values your currency rather than fear and you’ll find that you’re much better able to navigate the ebbs, flows, and unknowns of entrepreneurship.
Connect with Quest: Instagram Twitter Facebook LinkedIn Website
As far as she can remember, Quest Atkinson has always had an inclination towards chocolate. Being caught countless times over the years sneaking chocolate away and giggling, she decided to finally do something useful with her undying obsession and study this decadent “food of the gods”. After being face deep for two years in the Professional Chocolatier Certificate Program at George Brown here in Toronto, Canada, she now happily calls herself an alum. Like a proud mama bear, Quest gets intense enjoyment in preparing tasty treats for others to savour. She often has drooly dreams of making unique confections that will make people feel special. In fact, most of the products seen on her website are the result of happy collaborations with regular people that resulted in custom orders.
As someone who’s had a lifelong struggle with anxiety and depression, Quest knows all-too-well how impactful the small things can be. She explains, “because of the small joys my treats would bring to others, I found myself with a new life purpose awakening in me.” She started this business with the hopes to bring happy moments to those across the full spectrum of “sadness is my life story” to “gulp … I can’t go outside!” to “I feel meh” to “I’m walking on sunshine” and everything in between.